Have you ever stared longingly into your television* Illuminating an image of the cosmos, and thought to yourself; ''Gee I wish I was a horrifying monstrosity from beyond the stars.''
Well look no further for your dreams have been answered. Come join Cryptosporidium 137 on an adventure of a lifetime as you travel to strange new places, meet strange new people and liquidate them into a gooey mesh.
The video game opens on a scene of the Nevada desert. The United States military is attempting to Launch an interplanetary missile. I would presume the purposes of exploring space. (Although if they're anything like their communist Brothers they're most likely working on intercontinental ballistic missiles and decided that instead of simply shooting one across the Earth they can point it straight at the sky, take out the atomic weapon, replace it with a radio transmitter in it's place and proclaim that was done in the name of science. That's actually what the Soviet Union did.
Oh I'm getting off track again.
Anyways the missile attempts to go into space, hits the UFO and Cryptosporidium 136 is captured by the United States government. Much to the dismay of his Superior Orthopox 13 who now has to send the new clone Cryptosporidium 137 to clean up his old clones mess. He must also Harvest a crap ton of brain cells. Or is it brainstems?
While taking a business trip on the planet Earth you will discover many perils including Farmers with shotguns, an overabundance of military soldiers, communist propaganda and mysterious organization known as Majestic. You must work your way up from ringing local mayoral elections in small towns to killing a 50ft president whose brain is inside a robot. In doing this you will learn the human customs.
It's fun to look at the 'Furons' personality in this game. So simple, so to the point. The influence of human culture hasn't washed over them yet. And Crypto doesn't have his libido going on, it gives them; ''For all intensive purposes and 'Alien' perspective''. The alien race known as the Furons have been keeping themselves Immortal via the use of cloning technology. But their DNA is becoming warped and unusable with time. And since everyone in their race uses cloning technology and there is no pure DNA anymore they have to go to planet Earth to extract pure DNA from the brain stems of humans. The idea being that some several thousand years ago the Furons came to Earth and had themselfs a ''Close Encounter'' with the local population.
Dus ensuring that every human being alive today has a tiny bit of Furon DNA within them.
I love that so many children played this game. Every parent out there simply looked at the cover and said; ''Oh look a silly looking alien game. My child will love that.'' Not understanding that the game is full of sexual innuendos and adult humor that few child are going to get. It's a great example of parents who have very little interest in their Children's Entertainment and simply need to look for a glorified babysitter.
Now personally I don't think any children are going to be hurt playing this game or have any weird ideas in their head. There's no grotesque amounts of swearing and the violence is never over the top, you don't even see any blood.
It's made with the teenage Market in mind. Which is a bit strange to me as I don't know that many teenagers who watch old 1950s B-movies (although I'm sure there's plenty of them out there.) I think I was around 15 or 16 when the game came out, anyways God knows at the time I didn't watch a lot of B-films.
Destroy All Humans does win the award for greatest achievement for winning a video game. Upon beating most video games you're left with pretty minor accomplishment. Either it's personal self-satisfaction that you have beaten the game or a tiny reward such as an unlocked difficulty, alternative costumes for your player or in the modern gaming since you get a crappy notification in the corner of your screen saying you got an ''achievement'' what a hunk of crap that turns out to be. But not Destroy All Humans, If you complete this video game you unlock an entire film "Plan 9 from Outer Space" That's an hour and 18 minutes of entertainment.
DISCLAIMER: Please do not stare longingly into your television set, I don't care if you've got a tube-television or one of those newfangled LEDs, nothing good can come of it for your eyes.
Well look no further for your dreams have been answered. Come join Cryptosporidium 137 on an adventure of a lifetime as you travel to strange new places, meet strange new people and liquidate them into a gooey mesh.
The video game opens on a scene of the Nevada desert. The United States military is attempting to Launch an interplanetary missile. I would presume the purposes of exploring space. (Although if they're anything like their communist Brothers they're most likely working on intercontinental ballistic missiles and decided that instead of simply shooting one across the Earth they can point it straight at the sky, take out the atomic weapon, replace it with a radio transmitter in it's place and proclaim that was done in the name of science. That's actually what the Soviet Union did.
Oh I'm getting off track again.
Anyways the missile attempts to go into space, hits the UFO and Cryptosporidium 136 is captured by the United States government. Much to the dismay of his Superior Orthopox 13 who now has to send the new clone Cryptosporidium 137 to clean up his old clones mess. He must also Harvest a crap ton of brain cells. Or is it brainstems?
While taking a business trip on the planet Earth you will discover many perils including Farmers with shotguns, an overabundance of military soldiers, communist propaganda and mysterious organization known as Majestic. You must work your way up from ringing local mayoral elections in small towns to killing a 50ft president whose brain is inside a robot. In doing this you will learn the human customs.
It's fun to look at the 'Furons' personality in this game. So simple, so to the point. The influence of human culture hasn't washed over them yet. And Crypto doesn't have his libido going on, it gives them; ''For all intensive purposes and 'Alien' perspective''. The alien race known as the Furons have been keeping themselves Immortal via the use of cloning technology. But their DNA is becoming warped and unusable with time. And since everyone in their race uses cloning technology and there is no pure DNA anymore they have to go to planet Earth to extract pure DNA from the brain stems of humans. The idea being that some several thousand years ago the Furons came to Earth and had themselfs a ''Close Encounter'' with the local population.
Dus ensuring that every human being alive today has a tiny bit of Furon DNA within them.
The game is a pretty solid mechanic intermixing between futuristic over the top sci-fi weapons. and the ability to use psychosomatic powers to manipulate the world around you, the mechanics themselves work fairly well at least for the time
and only have minor mechanical issues. Particularly in the Louisville area 42. That's the only level where the bugs became incredibly noticeable and the game would have regular freezing. Unfortunately glitchy bugs is always been a problem in The ''Destroy all humans'' franchise, but it's livable in this game.
(I'm speaking for the PlayStation 2 variant of the game. It's to my understanding there was a release for some of the more modern consoles, and the game is in worse shape than it was before. It's a shame really)I love that so many children played this game. Every parent out there simply looked at the cover and said; ''Oh look a silly looking alien game. My child will love that.'' Not understanding that the game is full of sexual innuendos and adult humor that few child are going to get. It's a great example of parents who have very little interest in their Children's Entertainment and simply need to look for a glorified babysitter.
Now personally I don't think any children are going to be hurt playing this game or have any weird ideas in their head. There's no grotesque amounts of swearing and the violence is never over the top, you don't even see any blood.
It's made with the teenage Market in mind. Which is a bit strange to me as I don't know that many teenagers who watch old 1950s B-movies (although I'm sure there's plenty of them out there.) I think I was around 15 or 16 when the game came out, anyways God knows at the time I didn't watch a lot of B-films.
Destroy All Humans does win the award for greatest achievement for winning a video game. Upon beating most video games you're left with pretty minor accomplishment. Either it's personal self-satisfaction that you have beaten the game or a tiny reward such as an unlocked difficulty, alternative costumes for your player or in the modern gaming since you get a crappy notification in the corner of your screen saying you got an ''achievement'' what a hunk of crap that turns out to be. But not Destroy All Humans, If you complete this video game you unlock an entire film "Plan 9 from Outer Space" That's an hour and 18 minutes of entertainment.
DISCLAIMER: Please do not stare longingly into your television set, I don't care if you've got a tube-television or one of those newfangled LEDs, nothing good can come of it for your eyes.
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